Back in February I wrote a post called “Are We Trusted”. In
that post I talked about the need to establish trust with people in the community.
I asked, “How do we as Christians establish trust with our neighbors when time
and time again people are finding their first impressions about their neighbors
so wrong?” I then talked about the trust that has been built with a certain
leader in our community and how the trust developed over time.
I firmly believe that trust provides a solid bedrock for any
relationship. If people cannot trust each other, in marriage, friendship or
other, they have no solid ground from which to build their relationship. In
this post I would like to consider how the bedrock of trust enables our
relationships with our non-Christian friends to potentially grow into the
highest form of relationship; that of Christian brothers and sisters.
I am learning that the bedrock of established trust empowers
me to ask meaningful, even pinching questions. Trust grants me the authority to
go below the surface of relationship. If I am not trusted I will not be granted
that right. Trust must be earned, and once it has been earned any number of
conversations can be had because the person trusts me. They know they are not
being tricked. They feel as if I have a right to know. They believe I care for
them. Trust takes longer to build with some than with others. Trust may take a
great long while to establish with someone who has been repeatedly hurt by
people. But again, once it has been established the ingredients are there to
build higher and higher and higher until we both become devoted followers of
Christ.
Here’s how this has played out recently; A number of months
ago a non-Christian friend of mine informed me of a friend of hers who was
going through a tough time- we will call her friend Ed. Ed was taking care of
his aging parents and finding it incredibly stressful on other aspects of his
life. I stopped by his office one day because I happened to be in the same
building where he worked. My non-Christian friend had encouraged Ed to talk to
me even though he had never met me so my arrival at his office was not a
complete surprise. We talked in his office for about 15 minutes that day wherein
I told him that if he would like to grab coffee sometime I would enjoy it too.
A couple weeks later we met for coffee. It’s been a
slow-growing relationship since then. Some weeks it was just small talk and
enjoyable coffee. Other weeks it was deep. We are at the point in our
relationship now where he trusts me. He knows I genuinely care about him. He
knows I am not trying to get anything from him. Because of this bedrock of
trust I sensed was there I invited him into a Bible discussion group with me
and a few others and he quickly agreed to be a part. Is he actually curious
about the Word of God? I don’t think so; at least not yet. But he trusts me and
was therefore not afraid of the invite.
Ed and I are set up now to have the highest form of
relationship- that of brothers in Christ. Ed may end up rejecting the Word of
God and thereby disallow brotherhood through Christ; but the necessary
ingredients are there for him to find Christ. He trusts me. He is reading the
Word of God. My only prayer now is that the Lord will convict His heart through
the Word to repent and turn to Him.
I believe that if we will build trust with people they will
join us if we invite them along.
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